The Tree Has Got To Go!

Interesting Christmas this year....very interesting indeed!


Yes - we were up at 4:30AM opening presents....same as usual.


Yes - we devoured massive amounts of chocolate (ok....I devoured massive amounts of chocolate).


Yes - I made a kick ass, stuff your face, lick the plate breakfast.


And YES!  The tree has got to go.


Several hours after the opening of gifts - and the subsequent stuffing of the recycle bin....it was decided by a certain little boy that Christmas was over - and that meant that the tree needed to come down.


There he is - plucking ornaments from the tree and depositing them in a non-ornament box....when I so foolishly inquired as to what was going down.


"That's it Daddy!  I opened all my loot....so that means Christmas is over!"


"Really?  It's not even noon yet man....we have lots of Christmas day left."


"Doesn't matter!  It's time to clean up this place....the tree is taking over the room."


-YESSSSS!!!!  He is my son!!! I totally agree....the tree has got to go!-


"Well....Mommy likes the tree...maybe we can leave it up for her for a few more days?"


"Hmmmmm.......why?"


"Ummm....because Mommy likes the Christmassy stuff to be up until at least mid April?"


'Uh uh....no way.  That is NOT happening.  The Easter Bunny will get mad and not stop by....that just won't do!  Santa was here - he ate the cookies, drank the milk....and left me a pile of stuff.....but that's over now!"


"Over now?  You haven't even played with half the stuff yet!  Man....you're kinda Grinchy aren't ya?"


"Don't say that!  My name is Nicholas L!"


"Well how about this....we leave the tree up for a few more days....and then we'll take it down together.  OK?"


"How many is a few days?"


-I like this...precision!  Set and defined time lines and goals.  Such a Capricorn!  Just like Daddy!-


"A few days is more than 2 - but less than 4."


"3?"


"Yeah - 3 days"


"Why didn't you just say 3 days?"


"Easy there man....I don't work for you....you don't write my evaluations."


"No!  Mommy does!!!"....and then some rather maniacal sounding laughter.


And so on...and so forth....the conversation went on for another 15 minutes.  Not sure there was any clear winner...but there was no freaking out - so it's all cool.


It's been over 3 days now....the tree is still up.  My kid is a slacker!  Gonna have to remind him about this....I want that plastic piece of crap boxed up and stashed away....it really is taking over the room.  ;)

Where Are All The Autistic Kids?

I have a question.  


Kind of important...and I'm hoping for some feedback.


Where are all the autistic kids?


If the statistics are correct, with there being an incidence of 1 out every 150 kids developing autism - you'd think there would lots of autistic kids out and about.


But there aren't.  I should know - I get out and about....and I'm a pretty good observer of my environment.  I'm also pretty good at being able to identify autistic people.  I've had some experience in the matter.  I live with a little boy who has autism...as by now I'm sure you've all figured out.  So - I'm a bit of an authority on the subject.


So.  Just where are all the autistic kids?


And I think I have an answer.  And it's not one I like.


The kids are at home.  Living an isolated life because it's often just easier on the parents to leave them at home.  And no - I'm not blaming anyone for doing something like that.  I totally get it.  I've found myself on occasion wanting to do the same thing. 


But I don't.  He's my son.  And sure - he's a little off the wall sometimes....but he's a really cool dude.  So...I take him out with me.  We go to Wal-mart.  We go to the lake.  We go to Little Caesars. We go to the zoo.  We've even been to Disney World in Florida.  We go lots of places.  


No - it isn't always easy.  Sometimes it can be really difficult in fact.  But I have to take him places.  Our house is nice and all....but it isn't exciting - and it isn't all that the world has to offer.  There are times when I'm out with my son that I'll get the 'look' from other parents.  The 'look' usually implies "can't you control your child"...and "you must be a rotten parent".


To answer the questioning looks.  No - I can't always control my son.  And quite frankly - he doesn't need controlling...he's actually a really good kid - he needs understanding.  No - I most certainly am not a rotten parent.  I'm a kick ass parent.  I've got a son who tells me that all the time.  A rotten parent would have bailed a long time ago (sadly - that does in fact happen a great deal).


So...what's the point of this none too frequent blog posting?  It's this:  if you have an autistic kid.  Get him or her out there!  Experience the world with him or her.  And expose the rest of the world to the fact that not everyone is 'normal' and that these kids are part of society as well....and deserve everything that the world has to offer them.


And please, please, please...enough with the stupid looks when I'm in line at Wal-mart.  It's bad enough that I'm in the store as it is (I really don't like Wal-mart...and don't know anyone who admits to actually liking the place - and yet it's full all the time?)....I don't need people giving me weird looks.  Besides - we're going to around for quite awhile...going to lots of different places.  


So suck it up and get used it.  We're going everywhere.  You can watch...but please don't look.

Humpty Dumpty Didn't Fall....

....and he wasn't pushed either.  He was thrown.  I know it for a fact.  I saw the event go down in my kitchen not more than an hour ago.  It was a horrible scene - full of drama and devastation.  Oh the humanity.


So....what actually did happen you ask yourself.  Hang on.  I'm getting to it.


My son...who if you've ever read my infrequently posted to blog...is an interesting child.  Big time.


Today while I was downstairs in the office....I hear the words, "Daddddddddddddddddyyyy come here!!!!  Please".  He's demanding and yet polite about it at the same time.  Nice.


"What do you want dude?"


"I need your help."


"With what?"


"My story!"


"Huh?"


"Will you please stop whatever it is you are doing and come here?"


Sigh....sure....I needed a break.  The job search wears on me at times....and I'm sure there is something amusing afoot.  So - like the good dadio that I am (he tells me that I am...so there!)...I trek upstairs to see what's up.


What's up is the fridge door being wide open.


"What's with the fridge being open?  We have a/c dude....we don't need to cool the house by leaving the fridge open."


A little hand is just pointing at the eggs.....


"Huh?"


"Daddy!  I need an egg!  Just one please."


I don't like the sound of this.  But like I said - I needed a break from what I was doing.  And besides - this seems to have the potential to be funny as hell.  I'm game.


So....I take out the carton of eggs - and hand him one.  Singular.  No way he's getting all the whole carton.  I like funny.  I don't like (overly) messy.  It's not like it's Devil's Night....and this ain't high school....oh wait....that was me and my hoodlum friends.  You never read that....


"Here dude.  Here's your egg.  Now....just what do you have in mind?"


"Ahem!"

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again."

And then?

Wham-o!  The little man who doesn't throw a baseball all that well...wails the eggs onto the floor as hard as he can!

"Ha ha Daddy!!!  Look at Humpty!  He's broken.  Big time!"

"Um yeah....I can see that.  I like your story telling...and the mess isn't so bad"

"Glad you think so.  And guess what?"

"Yesssssssss?"

"Since all the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't put him back together again.....you get to clean him up.  You are the King to me."

If you know me....then you can imagine me rolling my eyes.  I'm good at it.  Too good on occasion.  I'm also gullible on occasion.

And with that?  The story teller/kitchen vandal darts out of the room with a slightly maniacal laugh. 

"Ha ha Daddy!"

So....I cleaned up the egg.  Picked the shell fragments off the fridge, off the cabinet....and off my leg.  I'm amused...and besides - I'm not a fan of eggs any ways.  Just ask my Mom.

Now....if he thinks he's gonna tell me some story about a cow jumping over the moon....well....I fear that won't end well.

We'll see.