The ceaseless battle between trying to be a helpful parent...and letting go and watching your kid gain his Independence.
My son has a new line that he's been working on for a little while. Quite simply its, "I don't need any help!" or sometimes worded as "go away Daddy...you're in my way!"
Over the past few weeks there have been a number of things that I am no longer required to be a part of:
- I am no longer welcome during bath time. It's become shower time at this point anyways...and he doesn't need my help for that. But he does need me to warm the towels up in the dryer (I invented the Toasty Towel!).
- He no longer needs my help doing his own laundry. Just today - it was announced that I had to "come downstairs with me right away!" so that I could see that he had in fact emptied the washing machine....loaded the dryer...and fired it up! No Bounce sheet though....so you still need my help there little man! Unless you don't want nice and fluffy laundry - in which case I'll have nothing to do.
- I am no longer needed to help him with his seat belt.
- I am no longer needed to help him pick out what he will wear for the day.
- I am no longer needed to help build trains sets.
Sigh.
He still needs me on occasion though:
- I'm the guy who fixes computers
- I'm the guy who gets to cut his drawing out of the paper that he drew whatever on.
- I'm the guy who gets to drive him all over town for his various social activities. One thing is for sure....he has a full dance card!
- I'm the guy who is instructed to 'build that!'. "That" being something that he has seen on You Tube while watching classical music....I've build a lot of stages over the past year or so.
- I'm the guy who despite all that he can do on his own still looks up to me for a hug when he's feeling sad....and I'm also they guy who has to "pick me up!" so that he can peruse his video collection...or grab one of his Captain Underpants books (like he hasn't memorized them all at this point!).
I'm the guy who at some point will be left there....standing way behind him as he takes off on his bike all by himself. He's almost there now....then what am I going to do?
I know as parents that we're all supposed to encourage our kids to grow and gain their Independence so that they can handle life after the parents are gone. I'm not ready for him to have all that Independence. I like him at 7 - just the way he is.
I like the fact that Daddy is the 'cool guy' and the one who can solve all of life's problems. And I want that to last forever. In a few years...he'll have a different opinion of Daddy. I'll just be Dad then (to my face)....or @$&%!*&^ (behind my back)....and I likely won't know a damn thing because I have no clue what life is like.
Stay 7 Nicholas....or at the very least stay 7 at heart (like me!)...and remember that once upon a time - I was actually a cool guy. I won't always be....
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